Apr
- Receptionist: Are you sure you don't mind covering reception?
- Me: Of course not!
- Receptionist: I'll only be away for 15 minutes and you're sure you'll be okay?
- Me: Yep!
- Me:
- Me:
- Me: How do the phones work?
Hi, I'm Sarah. I'm 24, sigh. I'm old and life sucks, but tv shows and movies are good, right?
My mood ring is always yellow and that's why David Fincher likes me so much.
I like to gif people I want to have sex with.
A blog description in bullet form!!11!!2!
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remotelycontrolled
volunteer(s) to run the 'Leslie Knope for President' campaign
Apr
Mar
- Okay, tell me how weird this is
- like
- I was talking to handsomegingerguy and things are going gr9!!!
- and we’re talking about how someone at work had their bike stolen
- so we’re looking at handsomegingerguy’s bike and he’s like,
- ‘I’m worried that someone will steal mine’
- and I’m looking intently as his super-strong bike lock
- but absent-mindedly,
- I’m stroking his bike seat
- and I sort of notice how weird it is
- stroking his butt-space
- the space
- where
- his
- butt
- goes
Mar
Crying because my friend at work just handed me this tape saying ‘ah yeah, he was so nice to interview’ and then he paused a while and said quietly, ‘he’s so pretty I wanted to cry’
Mar
- When a co-worker says you look womanly today
Feb
- Imagine a world where your working life was just one disaster after another.
- In a series of escalating embarrassments.
- And you think
- BOY THIS COULDN’T GET ANY WORSE.
- But then your boss’s bosses are paying a visit to the office
- so your boss asks you to call every 10 minutes pretending to be different clients so they can look busy
- I
- just…
- no
Feb
- Those really hilarious times when you accidentally say a massively inappropriate sexual innuendo to the handsome guy at work.
Feb
- Okay so there’s this guy at work and he’s tall with dark hair
- and like, boyishly handsome okay
- and the first time I met him, he carried all of these boxes for me
- SO HE’S STRONG RIGHT
- so a co-worker and I nicknamed him Clark Kent (so we could call him Clark bc Superman would be too conspicuous)
- but then just now I saw him at his desk and he had glasses on and a grey jumper on with his hood up
- okay
- WE CAST HIM WRONG
- He’s obviously Peter Parker
Jan
- They just had some pizzas delivered to work
- and the lady who was paying for them asked
- ‘Are all of the flavours mixed up?’
- and the pizza delivery-man just looked at her with so much disdain and pity and was like,
- ‘They’re called toppings’ and walked out
Jan
- There’s this guy at work whose name is Andrew.
- But sometimes he’ll come into work and demand to be called Will.
- And he refuses to acknowledge anyone who calls him Andrew all day.
- OOO GURL
Jan
- Okay, okay so I got an email about a bike ride that my company are doing
- and so I emailed HANDSOMEGINGERGUY and was going to make this supremely cute joke about us doing the bike ride together
- right
- right
- because we talked about how I am a terrible cyclist and THAT’S JUST SO CUTE AND ENDEARING TO MAKE A JOKE ABOUT IT
- so I opened up the email to write something like:
- blah blah blah joke blah so you should ride with me
- YEP SO FAR, SO CUTE
- but instead
- I wrote
- blah blah you should ride me
- YOU SHOULD RIDE ME
Jan
and remember, this is in one conversation. ONE, OKAY.
- Robert Downey Jr as Iron Man, I mean who cares about that?
- The Avengers is going to be awful
- I hope The Avengers fails at the box office
- Are you actually excited for the new Spider-Man?
- Who’s Andrew Garfield anyway?
- I wish they’d stop making superhero films
- I want more films like Avatar
Dec
Nov
- I guess it’s not technically in my job description but I just spent 45 minutes decorating my friend’s office for Christmas.
- I’M NOT JUST AN ADULT.
- I’M THE BEST ADULT.
Nov
- I’ve clearly made it into the sacred inner circle at work
- someone just made a masturbation joke about me/to me.
